Molding and shaping

The last few weeks I have been trying to squeeze myself into my pre-pregnancy clothes. I stretch and jump and wiggle and do some screaming as I try to pull that last inch of jeans up my thighs. I am sure it is quite a hilarious site to see but each time I come up short of my goal. I just can't get that final inch up without ending in a split pair of beloved jeans.
As I went through this dance in my mind today of longing to put those clothes on it hit me, I may never fit in those clothes again. Because I have changed, my body has changed, I am not the same woman I was a few years ago. The woman who could walk in a store and grab anything off the shelf and it fit perfect and look great. And I am okay with that. I am okay knowing my body has preformed miracles. I have two beautiful children. The Lord granted me the ability to carry these children and bring them into the world. I am more than okay with that. I am in love with that.
I also realize I have so much more molding and shaping to go through. I am not the woman God intends me to be. I am selfish, easy to be offended, and full of sin. I want people to look at me and see my outward appearance and think I have it together. I don't. I get angry. I take for granted my husband and children. I don't have a clean house or healthy meals prepared everyday. I don't take care of myself like I should.
But in spite of all that I am loved. I am loved with a never ending never stopping never failing love. I am loved by the Lord. He sees me and smiles. He sees me and rejoices. He sees me and longs for me to wake up and be still before Him. To sit in His presence and allow His peace fill me. He waits patiently for me to come and let Him mold and shape and perfect. That thought blows my mind, that the creator of the world longs for me to worship Him, longs for me to become the woman He intends.
I am blessed.